Hello! I’m Marian and I considered the most recent reading from the Audre Lorde’s The Cancer Journals to be a beautiful example of sisterhood and the power of human connection and the influence it has in the worst of times. Lorde seems to use sensory imagery to invoke the feelings she experienced whilst in the hospital between biopsies and the mastectomy. Lorde says, “The gong in my brain of “malignant,” “malignant,” and the icy sensations of that frigid room, cut through the remnants of anesthesia like a firehouse trained on my brain” (27). In this Lorde is describing the room but also her own feelings of the coldness she now feels inside herself. Lorde is at this point just coming out from being under and is forced to realize her situation, she has cancer and due to her lack of knowledge of any other black, lesbian, feminist poets ever having battled cancer, she felt very alone as she states, “This is it Audre. You’re on your own” (29). These feelings are in part due to lack of knowing anyone else that has ever undergone circumstances such as her own as well as the room she was in, the room seems to exude sadness, hopelessness, isolation and simple icy feeling that’s unkind to inhabitants of the room. Lorde’s use of the cold to present her feelings of loneliness are quite prevalent as she continues to present the coldness of the room as a discomfort until her lover and friends arrive. At that point she begins to present the feeling of warmth.
As Lorde’s friends arrive and the feeling of warmth is presented, Lorde also expresses a feeling of connected womanhood. Lorde equates company and support with warmth and loneliness with the cold so as more of her friends arrive and place spare blankets and their own personal coats on her bed, her loneliness seems to dissipate as well as the cold of the room, overall she simply no longer feels alone and that she must face this situation alone. Lorde has established a support group through friends and her own lover that beats her cancer, though the pain of her cancer is still prevalent, her loneliness is not. Lordes use of sensory imagery to convey this distinct change in environment and feelings is quite beautiful and I think fully conveys her true feelings about having cancer and the support network she had to help get through it. Lorde’s use of literary devices truly helps to add her own extra special personal touch to the work that for some authors it can be difficult to do, even when the work is about their own life. Lorde conveys her loneliness and coldness inside and how through friends it is transformed into a warmth and hope that nothing, not even cancer could try to extinguish. Though they do not experience all the same aspects of the cancer as her, they still are doing what they can to be there for her.
Work Cited:
Lorde, Audre. The Cancer Journals. Aunt Lute Books. 1980.
Skip to content
Hi Marian! I loved this blog and really understood the message you pointed out about feelings and personal connection that was shown through “The Cancer Journals.” To a certain extent, I believe that all of the variety of feelings Audre Lorde writes and shares are important feelings to have. She began to talk about her fear of death, decision making, individual and family effects, and many other ideas that revolve around emotions and feelings. Some of these bring her feelings of loneliness and pain, but connection is crucial in accepting, understanding, and overcoming these feelings. One quote that stuck out to me is when Lorde wants to find and explore the connection she can have with people, but needs certain people. She states, “But I needed to talk with women who shared at least some of my major concerns and beliefs and visions.” Sharing self emotions when going through a major life crisis is important and it’s almost necessary to have these warm connections with similar people with the same ideas or related experiences themselves.
Marian, I enjoyed your post and your understanding of how the reading was about Lorde’s feelings and her personal connections. I also would like to point out how Lorde really conveys her feelings and connections through her word usage. Lorde really evokes a sense of dread when she learns her cancer is malignant with words such as cold, frigid, and icy. The recovery room when she wakes from the biopsy is “colder than I can remember ever having been in my life.” (27) and “The gong in my brain of ‘malignant,’ ’malignant,’ ’malignant,’ and the icy sensations of that frigid room,…” (27). Cancer and her feelings on it are really driven as deadly and cold. I mean she is really showing her emotions or lack of emotion at this point. With her using words like this, it gives the reader a hollow and miserable feeling which is how Lorde felt. The lack of emotions here also tells how she is numb to the world. Yet, with her lover Frances she is warm. “Frances, glowing with a steady warm light close by to the island within which I had to struggle alone.” (30). This shows how having that connection with someone can really be the shining light that helps you keep going. That connection is essential to help keep someone afloat in a sea of dark misery. Even her friends that come and help with everything keep her warm with their coats. The connections made throughout life are there to help bolster someone’s spirit and give them a sense of not being alone in their darkest times. I think Lorde really drove home her feelings of the moment through her use of sensations in words of warmth and coldness.
Hey, Marian! I really enjoyed your blog post and how you capitalized on the duel meaning Lorde meant when she used imagery through her senses. The quote that really stuck out to me, that goes along with your post, was the line about the recovery room being “colder than I can remember ever having been in my life.” (27). Hospitals are often portrayed as cold, empty places, which relates to Lorde’s inner self as well. Especially, after having just woken up from previously having surgery, as the anesthesia wears off, the feeling of the cold, and being alone, empty, frigid washes over Lorde as she becomes more aware of herself and her surroundings. I think you did a great job with connecting the external with the internal, and I cannot wait to see your presentation!
Hi Marian! I think you did a wonderful job doing a close reading of this text, especially on the subject of her emotions and how they play out in her life. I specifically like the aspect of the cold and how you related that to a wider, more broad idea. The symbol of the coats on laying on her bed is a specific image that helps the reader understand Lorde more deeply. “I felt Beth Israel Hospital wrapped in a web of woman love…it made self healing more possible, knowing I was not alone” (29). Lorde understands that medically she has to put her trust in the doctors, but that they cannot heal her mentality on the subject. Her support “web” of women truly alludes to the power of women coming together in times of need which is one of Lorde’s constant themes throughout all of her works; if women come together to fight the bad things in the world they are unstoppable and extremely powerful. Lorde’s influence of strength and a collective idea of togetherness is far more powerful than what meets the eye.
Hi there Marian! Your response to the reading was truly great and I enjoyed how you focused on loneliness, and transitioned that into sisterhood and power. Even though Lorde is feeling particularly lonely in this journey, she also acknowledges that there are plenty other women sharing her exact feelings, doting on sisterhood, “And every woman there could have used a reminder that having one breast did not mean her life was over, nor that she was less a woman, nor that she was condemned to the use of a placebo in order to feel good about herself and the way she looked.” Through this passage one can note that although Audre Lorde does recognize that she is “alone” in this situation, she heavily acknowledges the other women that share in this extremely harsh journey. By shifting from loneliness to sisterhood, Lorde truly proves the power that women bonded together can hold, and how there is true strength in female love. Even though she is struggling through such adversity, power in sisterhood evidently hold immense influence.